i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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