I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize