I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
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