dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
