I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize