Texts From Last Night

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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?

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  (301): Is it necrophilia if we're both dead? http://tfl.nu/6pje
  Replies (6) Good night (622) Bad night (939) Order T-Shirt
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.

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  (480): So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction. http://tfl.nu/bt6f
  Replies (54) Good night (581) Bad night (4161)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.

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  (515): So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial. http://tfl.nu/ftzk
  Replies (11) Good night (3093) Bad night (632) Order T-Shirt
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.

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  (501): All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware. http://tfl.nu/9chk
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  that would be two times in a week with two different guys.

  (913): View more from Kansas

  they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?

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  (816): that would be two times in a week with two different guys. (913): they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right? http://tfl.nu/b8ql
  Replies (21) Good night (4009) Bad night (1007)
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  (818): View more from California

  well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning

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  (818): well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning http://tfl.nu/ywc2
  Replies (18) Good night (4490) Bad night (2186) Order T-Shirt
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.

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  (256): So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen. http://tfl.nu/ty3k
  Replies (3) Good night (2382) Bad night (533) Order T-Shirt
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  (850): View more from Florida

  My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.

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  (850): My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper. http://tfl.nu/6jx2
  Replies (15) Good night (2814) Bad night (858) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later

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  (970): We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later http://tfl.nu/sax8
  Replies (4) Good night (1980) Bad night (699) Order T-Shirt
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...

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  (319): i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself (612): It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool... http://tfl.nu/lubj
  Replies (7) Good night (2765) Bad night (796)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.

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  (850): Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick. http://tfl.nu/uv5q
  Replies (6) Good night (1977) Bad night (554) Order T-Shirt
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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.

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  (252): Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment. http://tfl.nu/wwwj
  Replies (5) Good night (931) Bad night (338)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?

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  (416): Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground? http://tfl.nu/za9i
  Replies (19) Good night (1041) Bad night (289) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.

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  (703): How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows. http://tfl.nu/x5bf
  Replies (3) Good night (192) Bad night (452) Order T-Shirt
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.

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  (816): Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard. http://tfl.nu/x9vd
  Replies (1) Good night (383) Bad night (139) Order T-Shirt

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