Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
