walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
