well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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