**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
