her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize