this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Well I just put wine in my tea
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
