so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize