I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
