When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
