I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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