I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
