someone get that fucking seahorse.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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