I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Randomize
