Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize