Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
