its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
porn star boner night. come get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize