some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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