i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
