It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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