So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
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