I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
