I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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