would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
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