This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
We need to get me chipped asap
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
