it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
You were trust falling into bushes
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
