No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
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