Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
