Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
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