I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
