So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
im about as happy as oj after his trial
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
