Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize