his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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