LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize