like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
