would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize