Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
