it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Who did Billy Mays play for?
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
