you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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