I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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