walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
