I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I looked at my own cervix.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
