I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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