I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
