I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
