I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
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