is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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